Dasani Decides to Start Purifying Water

Atlanta, GA – After eleven years of successful business with unpurified water, Dasani (owned by the Coca-Cola Company) has announced that beginning next week, they will finally begin purifying their water.  According to recent data, consumers who participated in a blind taste test reported that Dasani was the least preferred choice of water out of ten choices, including tap water.

“Well, we figured we went this long without people noticing, we might as well start purifying it before people realize what we’re doing,” said Coca-Cola chairman Muhtar Kent.  “After eleven years of providing the same water you could have got in a water fountain for $1.59 a bottle, you’ll now get purified water in that bottle.”

Dasani water will be joining brands such as Aquafina, Evian, Fiji, Voss, Poland Spring, Zephyrhills, Perrier, Nestle, Propel, and Fruit2O, who have been purifying their water for years.  It will be interesting to see what this water will taste like after the purification process begins.